I am going to start by saying this post will probably not be meant with popularity but I ask if it ruffles your feather sit in that and ask yourself why and lean into that. I am also going to share that remember ultimately this is MY STORY and what my family has learned and journeyed through this last year of 2020.
First and foremost I think we can ALL agree that this last year has been both stressful and eye opening all at the same time. I am sharing so we will REMEMBER the lessons and the changes that needed to be made and not go back to the chaos as the world begins to open back up and the unhealthy busyness and NOISE begins all over again.
The world as we knew it came to a complete STOP and most if NOT ALL did not know what to do with themselves and it was scary but for some of us it was completely AMAZING and eye opening to say the least.
For about the last 5 years I have questioned my walk my faith and if I am being honest Christianity as a whole. I have been a CHRIST FOLLOWER for 20 plus years and honestly serving the entire time which in retrospect I do not recommend. Serving here and there yes but as a young Christian wife, mom, and friend I was not ready for FULL time ministry we needed to learn MORE and Mom's if you hear one thing in this post hear this PLEASE, OUR FIRST MINISTRY IS OUR HOMES (HUSBANDS AND CHILDREN) NOT to be over involved in every event our local church is offering.
Questions I started asking myself were things like, why am I depressed, why do I feel burned out why is home and family life struggling and why do I see so many of our lives looking just the same if not worse than someone NOT in church???
I woke up one day a few years back and realized my children are all struggling, my marriage is struggling relationships in general seems surface and no real substance to any of them. My life seems to be in a downward spiral and I seem more busy than ever in fact everyone I know was BUSY BUSY BUSY !!
I asked myself over and over, "Is this ALL there is to life, busyness and service over and over and over again". event after event and bible study after bible study and for what to be honest not much was changing in my life or the lives of those around me and REALLY shouldn't it be I mean isn't that the purpose to GROW and to GO OUT and make disciples and was I doing this were any of us doing this ???
I pondered was I the only one going through this surely there has to be others feeling the same way and WOW what I have found over the last 1 1/2 years there are many feeling the same way. In fact many were happy about the "break" of 2020 which I have to say is very sad and why is that.
I see it in the church as much as I see it in the secular world the sense of HURRY and BUSYNESS everyone in a HURRY and everyone BUSY and we say it to each other often (I was one of them so remember NO JUDGEMENTS HERE).
Now this is where the rubber is going to meet the road and it's gonna be radically convicting remember this is my story if your feeling convicted and even angry by anything I share than lean into that and seek your own answers.
First things first I was blind sided by 2020 I was serving in Women's Ministry, in a good place in my marriage and kids all doing pretty well and than boom. All home and day after day wake up go to work and school go to bed and do it all over again day after day after day what is that the definition of "INSANITY" what I thought was all well was quickly coming to light and after a while God began to show us all we USED BUSYNESS to mask sin, communication and growth.
I spoke to many women in many different areas of Ministry in all kinds of different churches all over and even some pastors wives and all were saying the same things something is amiss.
One of the common issues was distraction we are Distracting ourselves into a spiritual oblivion.
Every generation has struggled spiritually but our struggles are unique to our generation how you ask ?
Pathological Busyness, Distraction and Restlessness!! There are so many more distractions today than even 15 years ago we are literally tormented to STAY BUSY.
We are swept up by a virtual way of living that many of us have forgotten to live in the reality of REAL LIFE. We check our phones more than we check in on others we read our emails before we read our bibles we are only partially listening to those in our lives because our heads our in our phones scrolling endlessly. Many of the women I have talked to about this have shared they ALL have much more anxieties than ever before as well as a HUGE case of FOMO (fear of missing out) that was never there before.
We check likes and are excited when we have many of them thinking these are all our "FRIENDS" now because they liked our post and it becomes OBSESSIVE the amount of likes we MUST HAVE in order to feel worth and what we post omg MUST GO VIRAL or it must not be good says who really???
When we clearly were not getting out of 2020 drama my family was forced to deal with all that had fallen by the wayside and our lives were turned upside down. First 8 of the 10 of us moved 1800 miles away during the beginning of the pandemic not knowing anyone in our area except sister of a friend in Vegas. This was a serious step in faith. Then whoa when we got there the MAJOR culture shock set in ! Went to at least 6 churches during a pandemic crisis was also a crisis. It was either Not a fit, WRONG DOCTRINE or the love of God was NOT there but I also believe God was trying to teach us all something before going right back into the church and service.
What have I learned in ALL the time of NO BUSYNESS to mask our realities well we learned that having a Hurried busy mind and life is not a healthy place to be it leads to God becoming more marginalized in our lives which leads to a deterioration of our relationship with God which then leads to us becoming more vulnerable to adopting secular assumptions on how to live life which then leads to conforming to a culture saturated in busyness and overload and the cycle is on wash rinse and repeat over and over again and again. Busyness my friends is a distraction the ENEMY is using to destroy our faith our homes our relationships and ultimately our lives as we know them to be.
We have been taught in recent years that fast is good slow is bad but this my friends is NOT the way of Jesus. God did not create HURRY or Busyness He did create Love and COMMANDS us to do so and guess what friends, Hurry and Love are incompatible it's like oil and water.
If we are walking as Christ did as we are to strive to do than we need to walk in Patience in love and make room for Joy and PEACE and none of these can be done in a hurried busy life.
I asked myself some hard questions one being "Have I as a Christian grown numb or even blinded to God's actual TRUTHS because of busyness.?
As I asked many people in my quest for there having to be a better way a different way I found that many of us have a false sense of following Christ and being a "CHRISTAIN" we think we are to turn the cheek , love our enemy, be kind, love all and go to church weekly, sign up for a bible study or two, serve here and there, go to EVERY EVENT and though those things are great we are actually "called" to live a life in CHRIST yes but in it's entirety yet I found my own household and many "others" living a life really no different than that of everyone else yet we are called to live in this world but not of this world and to live a life "set apart". We want the life of Christ and it all sounds real good yet we are not willing to adopt the whole lifestyle of Jesus. There are many many more things learned and to share yet this has gotten rather long really fast so I will cut it off by leaving you with these final thoughts until next time.......
1. I believe with all my being that life is meant to be lived OUTSIDE THE 4 WALLS OF A CHURCH and our time is fleeting and the end is MORE near THAN EVER BEFORE so live your life now you will never get the time back with YOUR SPOUSE your kids your family ever so live for more than the NEXT EVENT.
2. Go into everyday life sharing with those that don't know and again when confounded to the 4 walls you CANNOT do that.
3. Slow ourselves down make time for Kingdom Purpose things and STOP using BUSYNESS as an excuse.
4. Make your quiet time with God daily and a non negotiable period we must talk to him everyday going to church alone is NOT ENOUGH and not a healthy relationship with our Father He wants an intimate relationship with us can you imagine how healthy our relationships would be with our hubby's if we only saw them once a week for an hour or two NOT VERY HEALTHY!!!
5. Be very careful who is in your inner circle and whom you take advise from and allow to speak into your life. Be careful what your eyes see your ears hear and what proceeds from your mouth. Be careful what and who you follow and what their message actually is. "Bad company does and will corrupt good morals" .
Above all I ask you to pray about coming off this hurried/Busyness drug and come home to awareness to slow down and the things that you may have learned or pondered yourself this long year of 2020 please remember them as the world is trying to get back to normal . Don't allow yourselves to go back to the unhealthy normal many of us were in. Also I am putting out there a challenge to do what I am committing to which is a complete "SABBATH" OFF of all social media, TV , EMAILS text and devices of any kind for one entire day I am doing Sunday but you do a day that works for you . Go and live life outdoors or go bowling or skate just live life real life without SCREENS !!!! IT'S ONE DAY Y'ALL !!!
I have barely touched the surface of what we as a family have learned and are still currently learning more to come.......... STAY TUNED!!